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Baby Code

31 March 2013



My soon to be sister in law shared a video with me yesterday that was absolutely mind blowing, so I figured since it applies so well to my life now and is just all kinds of ridiculous I figured I'd share it with you. I'll put the link to the video at the bottom of this post but for those of you who can't watch or are simply too lazy, here is the gist:

We've all heard of a photogenic memory, people who have the ability to see something and instantaneously remember it (what we all wished we had while in school). Read a book once and remember it forever? Yes please. Well apparently there are other super powers that people can possess and one of them is called a phonogenic memory. Same concept as photogenic but instead of SEEING something and remembering it they are able to HEAR it and remember. Un-freaking-believable if you ask me. So a woman on Oprah, Priscilla Dunstan, discovered she had a phonogenic memory very early on in life. At around four years old she was able to listen to her mother play a song on the piano and be able to play it back immediately note for note. When she was a little older she discovered she would never need to take notes in school, anything the teacher had said she would be able to remember. Well now this is the part in the video where I'm sitting there saying fuck my life. The girl's a freakin prodigy and somehow won the genetics lottery. As I'm about to stop the video simply due to sheer jealousy, the woman explains she had discovered how to put this talent to good use. Intrigued, I listened on. Later in life the woman had a son and figured out he had 5 different pre-cries, the cries JUST before a cry becomes hysterical, and each of these cries signified a different desire. She discovered distinct "I'm hungry","I'm sleepy", "I'm uncomfortable", "I need to burp", and "I have gas" cries.

Ok, lady, good for you. Congratulations on being awesome. But wait. She soon discovers that these 5 cries aren't just her son's method of explaining what he needs but that, in fact, it is a universal baby language. Yes, you heard correctly. She cracks the "baby language", as she refers to it, code. Shut the front door. Seriously? Sign my ass up. So she goes through each of the cries, how they sound and how to distinguish between and them. She had tried them with hundreds and hundreds of different babies of different races and cultures and it works EVERY TIME.

So now I'm sitting here dumbfounded and decide to put them to the test. The first cry my daughter did sounded like the "I have gas" cry...I shit you not (pun DEFINITELY intended) she rips serious ass no more than 2 minutes later (and yes, I will have a post all about this coming soon, no but seriously). Maybe an hour or so later she did the "I need to burp" cry, so like a good little student I did and I was told and sure enough, she burps. I swear I was almost shedding tears of joy. If you have the time, DEFINITELY watch this video, it's a bit long (17 mins if I remember correctly) but totally worth it. And for all you moms out there, Yeah, you're welcome. Don't forget to comment and subscribe!


Ode to a Nikon

29 March 2013



So my camera and I have a relationship I'm almost uncomfortable with admitting. My Christmas gift to myself was a Nikon dslr camera and we have been inseparable ever since. And to be honest I'd probably take that damn thing everywhere if it were even minutely more portable. And Nikon can kiss my ass if they think I'm wearing that thing around my neck. I don't know how legitimate photographers do it...especially with bigger heavier lenses. 10 minutes of carrying that thing around my neck I'd end up a damn hunchback.

Anyway...I digress. My camera is fan-fucking-tastic. I have ZERO experience with photography unless you count the 30272926 pictures I have taken on my phone. But with this camera I feel like a photography wizard. Yes, wizard. This camera makes even the most novice of photographers look like they have a semblance of a clue on how to work a camera. I've always had a desire to learn photography but like everyone else I'm too lazy to ACTUALLY do anything about it. So I've been using it left and right. Please see below:



This is Gypsy. She's extremely photogenic. It's bananas. Her eyes pierce your soul.



This is Sadee. She's my purebred golden. She's also purebred ridiculous. Not very bright but the sweetest most loving puppy on earth.





I'm still learning but not too shabby for someone with zero DSLR experience. If you have questions don't hesitate to comment and ask, I promise not to be a snarky SOB :)

Batteries Not Included

28 March 2013



So now we're all caught up. My bug turns A MONTH OLD tomorrow? How the hell did that happen? I swear it was just yesterday I was at the hospital yelling at my blood pressure cuff and now here I am a mommy of almost a month.

So the boyfriend and I have still been putting things together and setting stuff up for the baby and my god is it annoying. I have to say, the last time I used batteries for anything other than a remote was years ago. But baby shit requires 1794862 batteries. Why?! Why does every damn baby item we own require batteries? Even my breast pump that I'm so in love with, how many batteries you ask? 6 batteries. SIX. Is that a fucking joke? I'm trying to pump a little milk out of my ladies and apparently I need to harness energy equivalent to that of power plant.

And not only that... Half the stuff requires those giant ass batteries. And they are NOT cheap by any means. I should have invested stock in energizer damn it. And the more I think about it the more I realize I will not be living a battery free life any time soon. Shortly she'll be playing with all those blinking, noisy, migraine inducing toys that all require batteries. None of which are ever included. Cool. This is a revelation I'm not happy to have made. Oh well. Rant over... Well for now.